When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris, Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing, Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis, When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down. Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves. Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink. Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis, Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost. Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill. If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, „Two seconds ‘til.” After you ask, „Two seconds ‘til what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
The quickest way to a man’s heart is with Chuck Norris’ fist, Chuck Norris shot the sheriff, but he round house kicked the deputy Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11… a suicide If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, „Two seconds ‘til.” After you ask, „Two seconds ‘til what?” he roundhouse kicks you in the face. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs When Chuck Norris lets the cat out of the bag, it’s a mutated, ninja-cat that has a thirst for innocent blood, Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Massacre Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72… and they’re all poisonous, 911 dials Chuck Norris to see if there’s any emergency he hasn’t resolved yet. Chuck Norris usually laughs, Chuck Norris doesn’t go hunting… CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING. Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72… and they’re all poisonous Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding Chuck Norris originally appeared in the „Street Fighter II” video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this „glitch,” Norris replied, „That’s no glitch.”.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris, There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live, Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV, A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV, Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink, When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris, When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down. Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.